I had a bit of an epiphany this morning!
I always like to wake early enough to perform a little ritual! I lie in bed on my side with Rowie’s picture grinning at me from the bedside table. My first words are always, ‘Love, Love, Love” – which has grown over the last three years to be my shortened form of “I love you, I’m in love with you and I will love you for ever”. These are the words that I said silently in my head, whispered, shouted, chanted, screamed for many months after Rowie died; hoping that he would hear me and understand just how much I was missing him. It sounds kind of corny but it became a routine; a ritual over time, and is something I now need to do before I start my day.
Anyway, I digress!
I had said my three words and was lying there thinking – this is my early morning kind of ‘meditation’. I’m not entirely sure it is true meditation; not like my TM that I do in my healing room, but I certainly have a great deal of inspirational guff that comes to me in these moments; so much of it unfortunately forgotten as I then move into ‘tablet taking/inhaler taking mode’ to kick-start myself before setting my feet on the ground and starting my crazy daisy not so lazy day.
Well, this morning I grumped at Rowie. I told him, in a light-hearted grump, that I had contracted to spend this life time with him and he had cheated me out of doing this! An answer came back to me immediately; bounced back as if off a taut rubber sheet. The answer was this.
“Get over it! We are all on a journey. Sometimes you start the journey with someone and you travel and finish the journey together – like going on holiday I guess, with a mate or family. Sometimes you travel alone – set off and return alone. Other times you will set off alone but pick other people up along the way. And of course there is always the journey you start with someone else but you part company with somewhere en route with a promise of catching up again at a later date…………”
It was suddenly as if a light had switched itself on. Chris, Francis, Rowan and I had started a journey together. Rowan took a detour! At some stage further along our track we will catch up with him again; for a huge hug and an amazing catch-up!
I can almost hear him saying, “there are times when you can be incredibly slow Mum!”
I got out of bed with a spring in my step this morning – and it wasn’t just the anti-inflammatories that got me going!
My visit to an awesome friend out at The Nuggets always uplifts me and gives me food for thought. She is such a positive joy germ and I always come away with some of her positive energy which she gives willingly.
There are people who are good for you and there are people who drag you down. Stick with those that lift you up. You don’t need to be unkind to those who drag you down. Just choose to be with those people who make you happy and with those who you in turn can help.